“I've been trying to find the word that says what I need to be in life. 'Brave' is the only word. It's the only thing that I ask myself to be.”

~Anonymous~

 

Hello world, it's been a while. How's things?

Oh, me...? Lots have happened within the span of time from my wedding till now.

And the sad thing is that they've gotten to me, and have left me bruised and hurt. The worst was getting depressed.

Yeah, it's sad but true. I hope I am coping well although at times, I sincerely think that I don't.

Just to name a few of the things that I have learnt:

1) Subtly evolving into the role of a daughter-in-law and sister-in-law, and understanding that differences in values are always there. It's always good to reflect, be optimistic and liberal about the actions of others.

2) Learning to manage and cope with work demands and unnerving characters at work. I learnt to be assertive at times while managing the expectations of others of me and simultaneously trying my best effort to give my very best to work.

3) Learning to manage my own stresses and how to manage my time between my work and my personal life. DO remember to put a boundary between work and life. Do not let work encroach your life. Why? Because it's two poles of my life. The only limiting factor here I guess would be me. Hehe

4) There can be no bigger obligation in life, than making sure that I am well and happy. (Easier said than done, I know)

So you see, there's lots to learn and grow here. And I think it's high time I do. I have been in a sheltered life for donkey years and it's about time that I learn to pay the fees to reality.

A friend told me that all these are not about change, it's really more about finding myself. Where am I?

Wish me luck folks!

luv, as always

Gamine

"It is not only the most difficult thing to know oneself, but the most inconvenient one, too."

~H.W. Shaw~

Lost but found.....I truly love and agree the last paragraph.

 

Gamine

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You would be very happy in a career that utilised your level-headedness, and allowed you to work mainly on your own. You want a career that allows you to be creative, without having to be involved with lots of people. Some careers that would be perfect for you are:

• Artist
  
• Historian
  
• Banker
  
• Novelist
  
• University Professor
  
• Photographer
  
• Vet
  
• Paralegal
  
• Graphic Designer
  
• Online Content Developer
  
• Webmaster
  
• Producer
  
• Managing Director
  
• Nutritionist
  
• Advertising
  
• Nursing

You like working and being alone. You like to avoid attention at all costs. You tend to keep to yourself, and not interact much with the people around you. You enjoy spending time with a few a close friends. You like to listen to others, but don't like sharing much about yourself. You are very quiet and private.

You are very practical, and only act after thinking things through. You don't like being forced to answer quickly. You have to evaluate the situation completely. You make decisions based on what you can verify with your senses.

You like to be deeply involved in one or two special projects. You like to be behind the scenes. You are very logical and fair. You feel you should be honest with others and protect their feelings.

You trust your gut instincts. You are easily inspired and trust that inspiration. You are very innovative. You analyse things by looking at the big picture. You are concerned about how what you do affects others. You worry about your actions and the future. You tend to use a lot of metaphors and are very descriptive and colourful in your choice of language.

You are very creative, and get bored easily if you don't get to express yourself. You like to learn new things. You don't like the same old routine. You like to leave your options open.

“Words make you think a thought. Music makes you feel a feeling. A song makes you feel a thought.”

~E. Y. Harburg~ (American Lyricist, Librettist and Song Writer, 1896-1981)

 

It's been some time since I really took notice of Jolin Tsai's songs.

This one caught me while I was travelling in our new car with the Hubz.

I really like it because I feel it. Not because I went through the same thing that the song is about, but because I really feel that she sang her heart out with this one.

Hope you'll enjoy this as much as I do.

Gamine

P/S: I can't find the MTV so it's just the song for this Youtube link.

 

 

惯性背叛 by 蔡依林

享受被爱的疯狂
嘘寒问暖 稀松平常
你喝水 你吃饭
你拥有的早已习惯

我在被爱的天堂 以为幸福不敢想
被哄着入睡 吻着起床
换一个人是否一样

惯性背叛 还天真的希望我应该体谅
像孩子找着新玩伴 很快乐 受了伤
明明回头却不敢让我看到你的慌
惯性背叛才发现你心如此害怕黑暗
原来什么都被锁上
我慢慢 觉得亮 越接近夕阳影子越长

你在被爱的门窗
总是盼望总是展望
人挤人的街上
再多解释伤 心失望

你在被爱的围墙
那个温暖的手掌
以为的捆绑 这是力量
被你冷战 陪你张狂

惯性背叛 还天真的希望我应该体谅
像孩子找着新玩伴 很快乐 受了伤
明明回头却不敢让我看到你的慌
惯性背叛 才发现你心如此害怕黑暗
原来什么都被锁上
我慢慢 觉得亮 越接近夕阳影子越长

惯性背叛 还天真的希望我应该体谅
像孩子找着新玩伴 很快乐 受了伤
明明回头却不敢让我看到你的慌
惯性背叛 才发现你心如此害怕黑暗
原来什么都被锁上
我慢慢 觉得亮 越接近夕阳影子越长

“Contradiction is not a sign of falsity, nor the lack of contradiction a sign of truth.”

~Blaise Pascal~

 

It's been a long time since I've blogged. I must be getting lazy.

Anyway, this article brought a sense of deja vu to me. It's really funny how an "ang moh" can describe us Singaporeans so well, by the mere observation of us abiding to our own contradictions. This is a must-blog! Hehe

Enjoy folks!

Gamine

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From the Straits Times Mar 18, 2009:

25 random things about S'pore youth

By Daniel Reimold

WORLDWIDE, randomness has reached a tipping point - and you can blame Facebook. The social networking site has got millions generating a list of their innermost quirks called, somewhat unimaginatively, '25 Random Things About Me'.

In the past six months that I've lived here, I have worked with, observed and come to respect one native group more than any other.

Youth.

So to my friends and family back in the United States, here in Facebook lingua franca, is a list of '25 Random Things About Singapore Youth':

1) They speak to me softly in perfect English, then turn around and scream in Singlish to their friends.

2) They SMS with a speed and frequency that makes my own thumbs sore from sympathy pains.

3) They admit they are apathetic, and speak about it passionately.

4) They complain about the lack of culture on their school campuses, then immediately go back to studying.

5) They wear their emotions and intentions on their chests in the form of T-shirt sayings. A few of my favourites: 'Little Miss Giggles', 'I SMS Your Mum' and 'Are We Having Any Fun?'

6) They are extremely quiet in class, but downright chatty one-on-one.

7) They love David Beckham. They lust after George Clooney.

8) Apparently, procreation is not their forte. At this point in their lives, they could not care less.

9) Marriage is not yet on most of their minds. Instead, they say they want to keep getting red packets of some kind.

10) Romance is not an art many young males here have mastered. I recently overheard two young women complaining that their boyfriends had surprised them on Valentine's Day with gifts - a schoolbag and an external hard drive.

11) They are incredibly, falsely, modest. They know they rock. Just don't tell them to their face. They'll look at you like you insulted their mother.

12) They are way too polite. I asked a young woman to take my picture in front of the Merlion. After she snapped the shot, she thanked me - apparently for the once-in-a-lifetime chance to capture me on film.

13) Speaking of photos, they pose for them everywhere. I recently saw a group of students smile for multiple pictures with their taxi driver at Clarke Quay. He was smiling too. The meter was running.

14) A few engage in 'serious blogging', but most just blog about their friends and pets and upload pictures of last night's dinner.

15) They are very productive during classes - at catching up with friends on MSN Messenger and updating their Facebook status.

16) They remain sceptical of their country's growing global status, often asking me 'Why would you want to come here?'

17) They already express nostalgia for days gone by, at the ripe old age of 17.

18) The few young men who have long hair seem to be teased mercilessly by friends, and hit on frequently by strangers.

19) They catch catnaps at the most unlikely locations - bus stops, campus canteens, even the school library.

20) Their eyes have a tint of worldliness to them, especially the young men who have been through national service.

21) They passionately watched something called 'The Little Nyonya' until recently, but not all will admit it publicly.

22) They think it is funny that Singapore has a professional basketball team.

23) They love their parents, but they definitely do not tell them everything.

24) They love to dance ...

25) But it does not mean they have rhythm.

This list may be random, but they make modern Singaporean youth truly an enigma - a mystery I cannot help but gawk at and adore.

Dr Reimold, 28, is a Fulbright research fellow serving as a visiting scholar at Nanyang Technological. University.

“Through not spending enough we spend too much.”

~Spanish Proverb~

This article was featured in the Asiaone.com website. It caught my attention as it presents a different argument as to what I've always thought of over-spending trends. It seems that there are more than meet the eye when it comes to parting with your hard-earned cash.

The actual article was printed by the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

I think it's best to take some time to think it through though. Different people may have within themselves a different set of values and cash saving strategies. This article is meant to educate and not change your mindset towards spending and I do hope that it helps gives a fresh perspective to you and your life.

Enjoy!!

Gamine

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Why we spend the way we spend

By Ma. Salve Duplito
INQUIRER.net
First Posted 09:31:00 11/19/2008

HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED why you sometimes skimp on restaurant meals or deprive yourself of your usual airplane model hobby purchases, and then all of a sudden buy a new leather bag or pair of shoes—just like that?

The urge to splurge can hit quick and fast during unguarded moments and before you know it, the trying-hard-to-be-frugal guy is separated with his money quicker than anything you have ever seen. These moments of irrational spending may or may not be major enough to cause deep dents in financial plans, but understanding why they happen—and when they normally do—will help you prevent the next one.

Drazen Prelec, associate professor of marketing at the Sloan School of Management, says in a study that “people’s complex behaviors towards money defy economic theory.”

For example, some buy lotto tickets habitually and invest in insurance at the same time. What’s the big deal about that? Buying lotto is risky behavior while insurance shows risk-averse behavior.

While Prelec’s findings are used mainly by marketing companies to improve shopping conditions to make consumers buy more, they provide fascinating insights on how people’s relationships with money really are very complex.

One of his findings is that we all have personal rules when it comes to spending—rules that we think will keep us out of money trouble. One example would be never to buy an item if it’s not on sale. When we don’t live by the rules, we feel guilty. That guilt is what he calls a moral tax on consumption, which interferes with the pleasures that we get from buying what we buy.

Marketers take advantage of these findings by offering bundled pricing. A home theater system may have additional high-definition television cables included in the package and a set of speakers, plus a table. The cables and table may not be free, but you will feel better purchasing the entire set.

Credit cards, he says, are “insidious” when people don’t understand how they work, because they remove the pain of that moral tax or make it appear that the pain is not there. A separate study has shown that most people who pay with plastic tend to spend more than their budget.

Money, wellbeing and success

It is no secret that people associate success, happiness, contentment, and status with what they have, the brand of clothes they wear, where they shop, the size of their homes, or the kinds of car they drive.

Some have what would seem like less selfish or shallow reasons for spending: making children or spouses happy, or keeping relatives and friends close.

With the boom of the consumer economy and the creation of factories and plants all over the world that create anything from toys to home decors, we never run out of things to buy but most often find that happiness and contentment remain elusive.

Studies on the psychology of spending shows that culture is now easily determined simply by measuring what sells and the average consumer, bombarded by choices, finds himself first knee-deep and then neck-deep in consumer debt and headlong into a jungle of consumerism-driven race in status.

This becomes more complicated when parents who try to fit into society by adjusting to the income brackets of people two or more notches above them, unwittingly send signals to children, who in the end wants the same PSP or mobile phone accessory that their classmates and friends have.

How to fight the urge to splurge

Understanding how or why we spend means we have to look into whether we fall prey to the contrived psychological triggers that marketers cook up to remove the rationality in our spending.

Augustus J.V. Ferreria, a registered financial planner, is an expert on heuristics where he analyses people’s spending patterns and customizes their financial plans based on his analyses. He recommends bringing a little notebook with you or using your mobile phone to jot down for a month anything that you buy—from gum to Spam—and what time. He says you will find patterns of spending you haven’t noticed about yourself. That should show you why you spend the way you do, and alert you to triggers.

Some triggers you should watch out for are emotional, like loneliness from being away from home or fights with loved ones, advertisements, holidays and special occasions, sale season, and promotions at work. The list is endless.

After all, there’s always a reason to spend if you want to find that reason. Taking control of your money will not happen by magic; it will require conscious choice.